


Subdued

by Dxllhxuse



Category: Game Grumps, Polygrumps - Fandom, Shipgrumps - Fandom
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Co-workers, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Mutual Pining, Polygrumps, ShipGrumps, Strippers & Strip Clubs, gender neutral reader
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-12
Updated: 2017-12-22
Packaged: 2018-10-31 02:13:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10889547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dxllhxuse/pseuds/Dxllhxuse
Summary: Regardless of how you got here, you were here. Alone in a place far from home and although you didn’t mind it, you didn’t exactly like it either. You worked at the most exciting place in town and you still felt an amount of boredom that surmounted anything you’d ever experienced.And regardless of how much Deepshore may have hated where you worked, and you inherently, you had to admit: Subdued was definitely somewhere where you fit in.





	1. Prologue

You always attempted to keep your personal life and your work life separated. A fake name here, a ‘oh I’m in a relationship’ there, lies not too big but they were lies nonetheless. You had lied so much about who you were that you found it hard to figure out who you actually were. Not to even mention that these lies kept you from making any sort of friendships outside of those you worked with; you couldn’t exactly be public with where you worked so even those friendships were strained at best.

You were a bartender, a host of sorts at your local club. However, behind the closed and chained curtains, there was another business--something taboo that the locals would only refer to by a code name--that the club fronted for. You recently started at Subdued, a spot you'd never heard of before you applied. To be honest, you hadn't heard of anything before you'd started working here. You see, you weren't from North Dakota, nor did you think you'd ever end up in a place so small. Big cities were more your forte but you couldn't resist the scholarships that were offered to you by various schools in North Dakota--who would turn down a full ride? 

Regardless of how you got here, you were here. Alone in a place far from home and although you didn’t mind it, you didn’t exactly like it either. You worked at the most exciting place in town and you still felt an amount of boredom that surmounted anything you’d ever experienced. 

This town was sheltered to say the least; living in buttfuck nowhere did that to the people residing there. And since it was so sheltered, anything pushing away from the godly image it wanted to uphold was shunned. Including Subdued. It wasn’t exactly a brothel and it wasn’t exactly a strip joint however it was exactly what Deepshore didn’t want. You’d only been working there for about two months and it had already been raided several times. Ironic considering the amount of customers that frequented in the early morning hours. 

And regardless of how much Deepshore may have hated where you worked, and you inherently, you had to admit: Subdued was definitely somewhere where you fit in.


	2. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a new change in your life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 4 am pls spare me

Your eyebrows furrowed and you could feel a sigh stirring within the softness of your lungs. The light illuminating from your laptop was blinding in comparison to the darkness that engulfed you and your surroundings and anxiety began to set in.

You were confused.

The words printed on the screen seemed to shrink into fine print and you couldn’t understand what they were trying to convey to you. You had gotten a full ride scholarship to your university; your grades may not have been the best but your admissions essay was apparently convincing enough to land you a spot. But now, from what you could tell, you had...lost it? Your scholarship gone, your easy college life was apparently over. You had spent the past few hours crafting emails to any and everyone--the College Board, the Dean of admissions, other students, _anyone who would listen_ \--you were scared that your efforts were in vain. It seemed that, no matter who you contacted, you couldn’t get a clear response as to why you were promptly thrown into a world of student loans and debt that you’d never experienced before.

“Are you still in here emailing those dickbags?” the voice was faint and seemed to reverberate in the hollow of your skull. “Y/N, give it a break already, it’s driving me nuts seeing you like this.”

You turned slowly, your eyelids heavy as you gazed upon the visage of your roommate who flipped the light switch. Tears welled in your eyes and they realized that you were done. “I’m scared, Charlie,” you said, your lips forming a pout.

They arched an eyebrow warily and took a step forward, dropping onto the bed next to your seat. “I know you are, babe,” they reassured, a tentative hand reaching forward and rubbing your own. Affection was something they weren't used to, receiving or giving.

They rested their head on your shoulder, the curly blues of their hair brushing against the side of your face as you looked to the blank ceiling and cried. The image could have been presented as holy had it been a painting; you, looking upwards towards a frowning god, tears streaming down your face and Charlie, body draped dramatically onto you as if to save you from a wrath unknown. But it wasn't holy; it was hellish.

Charlie’s thumb kept sweeping over the back of your hand as your body jerked with ugly cries.

“It isn't the end of the world—” they began and you could feel the beginnings of a tangent forming.

“Not for you!” You said and they pulled away to look at you with furrowed eyebrows. “This is all I have!”

You watched them roll their eyes and your nose flared with their disrespect. “Oh please,” they lulled and the anger welled within you as you stood. “College doesn't matter. Look at me! I'm doing fine without it.”

“Yes, but I'm not stripper material!” You were right, you may have worked in the same place but the two of you had talents in separate places. Dancing was not for you. “I-I'm an intellectual! I'm shy and I love reading and-and—ugh you don't get it!”

They weren't looking at you anymore; their head was turned away and they popped a lollipop out of their pocket and into their mouth. “Listen,” they were using their deep, serious voice and you felt like a child who was being patronized, “you're smart and young, you'll figure it out.”

“I know,” you huffed, tucking your arms against your chest. “It's just...I’m three years in and suddenly they've rescinded my scholarship! I don't have money dude!”

“You'll figure it out, you always do.” Charlie's tone held a tinge of an inexplicable emotion in a mix of bitterness and admiration. When you nodded, the continued, leaning back on their hands. “And, for the record, I'm not a stripper, I’mma _entertainer_.”

You scoffed and cracked a minute smile. You pointedly stared at the shoes they'd dropped next to them when they'd entered; half a foot tall and pinkly opaque, they had the unmistakable strapiness of stripper heels.

“Oh shut up,” they cracked and you finally let out the laugh they'd been trying to squeeze from you. They let out a sigh and you motioned them to follow you.

“Work?” You hummed from your position in front of the refrigerator. You didn't have to see them to know that they nodded. You slid a can of cherry Coke towards them and they nodded gratefully as they cracked it open.

“Dickass accused me of stealing his tracks again,” they explained, leaning across the countertop ever so slightly as they spoke. “As if I want his fuckin’ tracks!”

“Whoa whoa,” you interjected, poorly refraining from laughter. The sour scowl that tugged on Charlie's features despite the sweet in their mouth was enough to make a small wheeze escape you. “Are you talking about Babyboy?”

“Yeah, whatever the fuck his name is…” They gulped down some of their soda and sat back against the stool. “It's like ‘ _Listen dude, we don't coordinate well! I'm sorry my good taste in music is leaking onto you_ ’.”

“Wouldn't it just be easier to like...make a register of something of who’s performing which songs when?” You mused, stealing a gulp of their soda and earning a glare.

Tucking a strand of hair behind their ear, they shook their head. “My boss is an asshole, he wouldn't listen to shit I’d say,” they confessed. “He's racist _and_ sexist, these tits aren’t doing me _any_ good with him.”

You pressed your fingers against the countertop before shrugging in response. “I'm front of the house, I don't know how much influence I would have.”

“Over him? None probably, over town officials? All of it.”

You frowned in distaste at what they were insinuating. “I'm not blackmailing people for you,” you urged and you could remember the late nights on the walk home where Charlie would suggest it. “It's evil and sabotage isn't really my game.”

They hung their head slightly, a small gesture that told a lot yet went unnoticed by you. “Miss Goody-Two-Shoes ruins Charlie's fun once again.”

They tossed their head back, chugging the rest of the soda before slamming it back down with certain aggression. You jolted and looked up at them with furrowed brows. Before you could speak, they held up a hand and drifted closer to where their room was.

“I'm headin’ to bed,” they said, hand dropping and the laziness of their movements hurt you just a bit. They never really seemed to care about _anything_. “Give up the college thing,” they stopped and looked at you, “it's all institutional bull anyway.”

Biting the inside of your cheek, you sat unmoving and watched them retreat. You weren't destined for dropping out like they were; you didn't understand why they seemed so adamant on you giving it up like they had. People's paths are different, you understood that. But did they?


	3. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You take a late night trip to the local corner store.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These mislabeled chapters are gonna kill me i'm so so sorry

You called in sick from work the next night, choosing to instead wallow just a bit longer. Charlie had come into your room earlier to scowl at you, but you didn’t move before hearing them mutter and walk away. Your mind was trapped in a flurry of emotions and you knew wallowing wouldn’t get you anywhere but you just didn’t know what to do! You had called your parents earlier when the sun was still up, and let them know, they tried to assure you that everything would be alright but you could hear in their strained tones that everything was, in fact, not going to be alright. They suggested you take a break from everything for awhile, suggested that you take care of yourself before your problems and you really did appreciate that. You appreciated  _ them _ .

You were shimmying into a pair of jeans before you could consciously register what you were doing and that was the only push you needed. You were afraid to look in the mirror, knowing you’d look like a mess with your swollen eyes and deep circles, so you settled on trusting that you didn’t have anything abhorrent on your face. You tossed on a hoodie and then a jean jacket and pushed yourself once more to actually leave your shared apartment. You didn’t have a plan, however- you had already called off of work and there weren’t many places that would be open at such a late time. Shoving your hands into your pocket, you puffed warm breath into the cold dewiness surrounding you and walked. You briefly glimpsed the time on your hasty way out of the door and knew it wouldn’t be long until Charlie got home. They’d be glad you were gone. 

You sought the refuge of a corner store along your walk, the fluorescent lights beckoning you to forget your anxiety for the few minutes you’d be within it. There was a man behind the counter; he had his feet propped up on the glass countertop and didn’t spare you a glance as he focused on the foreign soap opera he had playing. You dragged your feet against the ground and stopped in an aisle full of junk foods that, had you been here under any other circumstances, you would have been ogling with a hungry desperation. Your mind couldn’t seem to focus though, your eyes dimmed in and out of focus as you stared at candy bar labels with no actual decisions coming to mind. 

You could feel the clerk actually look at you, you were beginning to freak him out. 

“Excuse me.” The voice was barely audible in the haze of your dissociation and it seemed to take forever for your eyes to trace up from spindly fingers to a face full of stubble and angles. There was something vaguely familiar about the tight-lipped smile the man gave you that you couldn’t place, but he had grabbed a bag of candy and was already tossing change onto the countertop as the clerk waved him on.

You grabbed a bag of candy too, not paying any attention to the actual brand, and instead kept your eyes focused on the man who seemed to slow down time. He was walking so fast, you noted, but maybe it was a result of the fact that he was so tall. You started slowly after him, one foot before another and, not fully aware, you had run out of the door. You skidded to a stop when you saw a car skidding down the road, plumes of dark thickness emanating from the battered tailpipe as it took off into the distance.

“Hey!” 

You spun and finally felt the warm grasp of the clerk's hand on your clothed arm. Your line of vision dropped to the candy in your hand, unpaid for, and you profusely apologized, attempting to explain yourself. He didn’t look very convinced but allowed you to pay for it anyway, muttering things in a manner that you could not begin to define. 

The only things you could consciously sense was the grating stickiness of the candy you were eating and the thudding clod of your boots against the icy pavement as you returned home. You paused, tripping briefly over an untied lace and finally noticed the soft buzz of your phone against your pocket. You fumbled, your cold fingers having to tap multiple times to answer the call.

“Dude, where the hell are you? Are you alright? You’ve had me worried fuckin’ sick!” Charlie’s voice seemed to double between the phone and your surroundings and you looked up the stairs to your apartment. They were standing in the doorway, still holding the phone to their ear and looking at you. Bouncing down the steps lightly, you began coming slowly out of the viscous fog that had you for who knew how long. 

They were looking at you expectantly and you ran a hand through your hair, pulling at it to ground yourself before asking them to repeat the question. The question was lost in your mind once again and you laughed bitterly, feeling a bit silly but still refusing to ask them to repeat themselves. “I went down to the convenience store for a few minutes,” you said, motioning to the near-empty bag of what you could now see to be Skittles. 

“Nearly an hour is a few minutes?” They led you inside as they watched you carefully. You had never really seen them worried about you before.

“I guess I got stuck,” you laughed and they opened the door to your room. “The clerk was watching this really interesting soap opera!”

They were looking at you incredulously and their dark eyes seemed to bore into you. “Y/N,” they said, taking an inflection to their voice that made you worry that maybe they were justifiably concerned. “Are you okay?”

You had to think for a moment. Were you okay? “I-I’m fine,” you managed out after a moment of silence. “I needed the time to really clear my mind y’know? I may have lost track of time a little but that’s alright. It won’t happen again, okay?”

They nodded and the way their indigo curls bobbed made you realize that you were really tired. When they finally left, you laid down on your bed, still fully dressed and stared at the uneven terrain of the ceiling. You couldn’t shake the uncomfortable familiarity of the person who slipped past you in the store, yet you couldn’t even remember what they looked like. They were more a felt than seen. 

Maybe you weren’t alright. 


End file.
